Define Girls and Boys ,Alia Jokes,One day a man asked God,Modi ji sirf acche din denge,Kitna hasin chaand sa chehra hai ,Main ne us se bas itna hi puchha tha ki ,Chale jayenge ek din tujhe tere haal par chodkar,Husband: Kaisi ho Jaanu ,Ek lesson us galti se jo kejriwal ne ki aur modi ne nahi,

Kitna hasin chaand sa chehra hai 

Kitna hasin chaand sa chehra hai,

uspe shabab ka rang gehra hai,

khuda ko yakin na tha wafa pe,

tabhi to ek chaand pe hazaaro taaro ka pehra hai 

Main ne us se bas itna hi puchha tha ki 

Main ne us se bas itna hi puchha tha ki,

ek pal mein.. kisi ki jaan kaise nikal jati hai,

Us ne Chalte Chalte apna haath mere,

Haath se chhura liya 

Chale jayenge ek din tujhe tere haal par  chodkar

Chale jayenge..

ek din tujhe tere haal par chodkar

Kadar kya hoti hai pyar ki tujhe wakt hi sikha dega 

Husband: Kaisi ho Jaanu 

This is killer :

Husband: Kaisi ho Jaanu, tum mujhe miss kar rahi hogi toh socha call kar loon ?

Wife: Aur subaah jo ladai hui thi, woh kya tha?

Itna hi pyaar aa raha tha toh ladai kari hi kyun subaah subaah?

Husband: Silent.. (thinking.. Saala yeh toh ghar ka number lag gaya!!) 

Modi ji sirf acche din denge 

Modi ji sirf acche din denge..

.

.

.

.

.

Acchi rato ka intezam khud karna hoga! 

Ek lesson us galti se jo kejriwal ne ki aur modi ne nahi 

Ek lesson us galti se jo kejriwal ne ki aur modi ne nahi,

kabhi bhi jab tak agli job na mile,

current job se resign nahi karna chahiye! 

 GF: Jaanu aaj milte hain ..

BF: Kahan milna hai?

GF: Koi sunsaan jagah jahan koi na ho ..

BF: Theek hai, ek ghante me congress office me milte hain! 

Define Girls and Boys 

Define Girl..

The one who before goin out for a party.

Gets

Facial,

Bleach,

Waxing,

Hair curling/straighting,

Threading,

Toning,

Scrubing,

Moisturising,

done

&

Puts on

Lipstik,

LipGloss,

Lipliner,

Perfume,

Body toner,

Body lotion,

Eye liner,

Eye shadow,

Eye maskara,

Foundation,

Face powder,

Rings,

Bracelets,

Neckless,

Nail Paint,

Party dres,

Sandal,

Purse,

and Says: Yaar! Jaldi mein kuch kiya hi nahi, aise hi uth kar aa gayi.

Now Define Boy..

The one who before goin to party calls his friend & asks:

Bhai, tu nahaa kar aayega kya?

Friend Reply: Chal be saale! Tere baap ki shadi hai kya? 

 One day a man asked God 

One day a man asked God:

Is it wrong to sleep with other women after marriage?

God replied: No

Man: So why do people say it is bad…

God: It is not bad… But the problem is U Rascals don’t Sleep!! 

Alia Jokes 

Alia Jokes:

1. BJP needs 272 to win

Alia- in how many overs?

2. Pappu – aj maine windows 8 install ki

Alia- huh… 8 to bahot purani hai pappu, mere computer me windows 98 hai.

3. Pizza guy – pizza ko 4 slices me kaatu ya 8 me?

Alia- 4 me hi kaato, 8 nahi kha sakti main

4. Amitabh bacchan in kbc – who is the coach of women’s indian hockey team?

Alia- shahrukh khan.. no no sorry sorry.. it’s kabir khan.

5. Translate in hindi – my mom is kidding

Alia – very simple.. meri maa bacche kar rahi hai.

6. Deepika- have you seen chennai express?

Alia- no.. my IRCTC was not working 

Define Girls and Boys ,Alia Jokes,One day a man asked God,Modi ji sirf acche din denge,Kitna hasin chaand sa chehra hai ,Main ne us se bas itna hi puchha tha ki ,Chale jayenge ek din tujhe tere haal par  chodkar,Husband: Kaisi ho Jaanu ,Ek lesson us galti se jo kejriwal ne ki aur modi ne nahi,